


Uncountable days and nights

by charons_boat



Series: hello strange place, strange time, strange dream [1]
Category: CIX (Band), Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: 3RACHA Ensemble, 3RACHA are performers, Abuse of trust, Altars, Angst, Aussie - Freeform, Beach cuddles, Betrayal, Birth of a God, Blood Drinking, Comfort, Concerts, Creation, Cuddles, Dreams, Dryads - Freeform, Fluff, Gods, Han Jisung | Han/Seo Changbin - Freeform, Kidnapping, M/M, Mentioned Felix, Multi, Near Death Experiences, Old Friends, Platonic Relationships, Polyamorous relationship, Rituals, Sculpting bodies and souls out of clay and light, Separation, Story-Telling, Sunsets, Swimming, Unconventional vampire, Unwilling Transformation, beach, chan is a wolf shifter, chan is on the ace spectrum, changbin is demisexual, copied souls/copied bodies, cute boyfriends, difference between yonghee and "natural" vampires, differences between chan and "natural werewolves", disregard for non-human life, ends in modern time, feeling unsure, felix is a water spirit, god-making, godly evolution, godly parallels, inspired by Jungle, jinyoung is a god, mentioned cix ensemble, mutual pining between them, non-specific time frame, oral legend, over-protective (against the sun) boyfriend, people are buried in sand, soft and cozy blood drinking, sunscreen uwu, twisting of stories, yonghee is a vampire
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-28
Updated: 2021-01-07
Packaged: 2021-03-11 03:20:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 7
Words: 18,159
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28388427
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/charons_boat/pseuds/charons_boat
Summary: Yonghee had heard all the stories, seen all the statues. He just didn't know where to start looking because none of the stories ever said where they chained him--or where he gave himself up, depending on what version you heard.
Relationships: Kim Yonghee/Bae Jinyoung, Kim Yonghee/Bae Jinyoung/Bang Chan, Kim Yonghee/Bang Chan
Series: hello strange place, strange time, strange dream [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2164404
Comments: 47
Kudos: 17
Collections: WIP OLYMPICS: WINTER 2020/21





	1. It's your habit to control

**Author's Note:**

> 12k words all because they covered baejin in gold in the jungle mv... i want pictures of that but those don't exist so. enjoy this!
> 
> warnings: kidnapping, near-drowning, near-death, entrapment, mentions of blood

There is a story my people like to tell of a forest, of a tree, of a boy, of a god. It starts with the forest and the ancestors of my people. They'd moved near the massive, ancient wood when it was still wild and untamed, when they understood so little of the world. In those days, strange creatures still roamed the world, and the people of the then-small village had seen none of them. Not a single man or woman, and not even the elders, had any clue what they'd find in the wood. They didn't _expect_ to find anything beyond plentiful timber. They began to cut down trees and build their houses, unknowingly killing dozens of dryads and other spirits. The forest, expectedly, was filled with rage. No such thing had ever happened, and so they started a war.

Imagine the fear in the faces of those ancient people, as they saw trees marching upon their home. They must've thought themselves to be in a waking nightmare. But the war hadn't lasted long, because amongst all the trees of the forest--for nearly every tree had moved on the village, so that only a single tree was left, one that had stood in the near center of the forest--only one had refused the war. The tree shook in its place despite the lack of wind; there was a boy standing in front of the ring of trees surrounding the village, frail and young compared to the rustling branches and cloud of anger hanging over the encirclement. His hair, such a dark black that it was almost blue, was the same color as the odd bark on the far-off tree, the leaves containing that same, bluish sheen within the unnatural cells. No one knew at the time: none of the villagers knew, that is.

The boy stood before the trees with shaking limbs, small and thin, and he called out something along the lines of, "I'm not letting you hurt them! They didn't know! We just-- we can talk to them! Make sure they stop, o-or ask! Surely we can come to some kind of agreement!" The villagers stared at him in awe, finding his bravery to be wonderful. They thought him beautiful, and humans... they've always lusted after beautiful things. The trees retreated, and the boy kindly explained that the trees had spirits. "If you need wood," he explained softly, "just come to the edge of the forest and ask for Jinyoung. I'll lead you to those who... are willing to sacrifice for the forest." Some say he'd looked sad while saying that, and others said he'd been all too glad as he said it.

To the surprise of everyone in the forest, the humans did call out for him. He came willingly, beautiful and ready to help them; he'd already talked to everyone in the forest and had memorized who was ready if needed. To his surprise, the humans had only a rope and a bag with them. They'd advanced towards him and fear had darkened his heart, and he'd run. It was far, much too far to his tree for him to be safe. He ran too swiftly for any of the others to sense his distress, for they'd all gone into a deep slumber to regain the energy they lost in their war attempt. The humans caught up quickly because Jinyoung was tired too. They tackled him and bound him with rope, and they hid away his terrified, frenzied tears with the cloth bag. By the time the trees began to stir again, he was long gone. The humans had dragged him to a strange altar, one like a tiered pyramid in the midst of a pool of water.

Even now, no one knows where it is. Some think it in a cave deep underground, while others think it in the mountains farther east. Some believe that the well was empty and used to lead to a secret cavern underground, put there by people unknown before the village was built. But the villagers dragged him to the unholy place, and they dragged his unconscious body down the submerged path to the pyramid. He started to wake by the time he reached the pyramid, having felt the cold lapping of water against his bare, cut feet. However, he was already on top of the pyramid when he woke, the bag gone despite his hands still being bound. He opened his eyes just in time for the villagers to light the paths to the top with bright flames. They crawled towards the terrified boy like hungry beasts, and he started to cry once more. They soaked up his tears with glee, excited to see the boy giving them the gift of himself.

The flames melted the golden platform beneath him, and he fell down beneath the altar into a pool of liquid gold. More of the shimmering, liquid metal began to fall upon him, filling the pool to the brim. He panicked and struggled in the pool, and someone held up the leaf they'd taken from his tree. When it began to glow golden, the villagers all murmured amongst themselves and came to a consensus as Jinyoung struggled and weeped below them, near to drowning in the gold. _He is our new god_ , they decided. _He is the god of light, of life. We must've found a blessing in him._ As their belief swelled and washed over the chamber, falling through the dripping opening in the altar, Jinyoung took it into his being just as the gold coated his skin and his clothes. Jinyoung stopped struggling, breathed in the gold for a few moments, and felt the ropes dissolve. The altar crumbled upon itself and fell inwards, the pieces landing all around Jinyoung but not landing in the pool of gold. The villagers gathered around the edge and watched as their god rose from the gold, resplendent in his beauty. He was draped in the stuff from head to toe, and it gushed from his mouth when he opened it, dripping down his chin as he spat. He looked up at the people surrounding the hole in the ceiling. _His people._

He climbed from the knee-deep pool and lifted his arms to the people, asking their help. They reached down and grabbed his hands, his forearms, and they lifted their god from his birthplace. The leaf fell to the floor, forgotten, as they excitedly left with him, chattering to him about their requests and their questions. He glanced back for a moment, but he turned his face away from the memory of everything before. If he was to keep his people satisfied, he could not remember the past. His golden eyes hardened and he listened to the people, to their requests and their demands and their inquiries. He tried his best to answer all their expectations and questions, tried his best to live up to what they thought the ideal of a god. He was new, though, painfully so. Even as generations were born and ravished by time, he remained. His black-blue hair and heavy golden eyes never changed, though his clothes showed the wear and tear of time, of a god amongst men. It became a privilege amongst the village to tailor the god's clothes, to drape him in the finest fabrics wrought by the most skilled of hands. They would give him offerings of their finest foods and crafts, and he put everything he couldn't wear in a finely crafted chest. The people believed that as a god born of gold, only golden gifts would suffice. Truth be told, none of them thought to ask if he'd have accepted anything else, but no one disagreed that he was resplendent draped in gold and jewels. Deep in the forest, the limbs of a dark tree bowed low to the ground, heavy with the kiss of godhood and gold.

Jinyoung was new, and so he soon grew overwhelmed. It was too much. He tried to satisfy the people, but their demands grew to be too much, too many. He rose from gold into godhood, but he fell from grace amongst chains and tears. Humans have always lusted after beautiful things, and they thought nothing more beautiful than their god. They took everything from him and left him empty and cold; when he tried to leave, to run back to the forest and to the tree from which he'd been so long removed, they caught him once more, as their ancestors had so long ago, and they bound him in rope. They believed he would not escape them, and so he could not. They dragged him somewhere distant and desolate, and they chained him, locked him in place. He struggled when he woke, but he had always been little more than a boy, and so he could do nothing. He could only wail as his prison grew colder and darker, ever more removed. Once the first flake of snow fell, more soon followed. They kept falling, wouldn't stop. He shivered in his ragged clothes as somewhere far away, a dark tree shivered under the weight of hopelessness and chains. Pearls of golden light beaded up from the bark and the leaves, covering the ground beneath the tree's branches. It is lucky that the villagers no longer remembered the ancient war with the trees, that they could no longer recall where they'd stolen their god, for if they had known, they'd have stolen his sorrow from the roots of his tree.

Over time, as statues of a god in ratty clothes and heavy chains were erected around the rapidly growing village, the story changed. I was there for the change; I lived through many of the different iterations, heard the twisting of the oral legends with my own ears. The village could no longer believe that our ancestors had chained up our own god, forced him to stay when he so clearly wanted to leave. They now believe that he rests in a frozen-over coffin of glass, where he'd gone to protect them from some unknown force. He lies there, waiting, listening, ready to burst free someday and save them from yet another danger.

* * *

I was born of a dream, one full of light but draped in darkness. The dream was beautiful, the colors blurry from overexposure and smeared as if with tears of laughter. When I left his dream, I found the world... bleak, and sad. I felt something, too, where I had felt nothing in the dream. A rampant hunger that was stark and demanding, though not so much that I went wild when I smelled the metallic tinge of blood in the air. I stood and watched as a child bled. I knew then that that was what I needed. What I wanted. Blood, red as a ruby, sparkling prettily in the sunlight. I almost felt that the sun should've hurt me, like some deep-seated fear, but the sunlight did nothing. Just danced upon my skin, tangled with the wind, kissed me before moving on.

When I first heard the story, I knew too many parts of it. I'd never heard the story before, but it resonated with an untouchable part of myself. I knew him. He'd dreamed of me. His face was nothing I'd seen, but his essence--his essence I knew. There had only been one other he'd dreamed of, an untameable wolf from times long past. I remember him dreaming of eternity, of helpless giggles and curly grey hair. I remember him dreaming of me, of quiet warmth and gentle restraint. I remember him thinking nothing of himself, of feeling his pain and anguish.

I rose from a pool of gold buried deep underground. I'd managed to pull myself into the room above it, and noticed only when I was wading through the water that the liquid gold had rolled off of me as the water wasn't doing. It was like the gold had been unable to touch me, like it hit some barrier all across my skin and my clothes. The water, on the other hand, soaked into my tan pants. I felt strange against my ankles, and parts of my white shirt were transparent where I'd slipped into it trying to pull myself up through the hole in the ceiling. I wandered my way out of the strange place into the world above, into the caress of the sunlight. I walked until I found the village-- _my people_ \--and I heard the story of our god for the first time. I heard the story of _Jinyoung_ for the first time. I took to wandering the forest, small and cloaked in darkness as it was, and I found the black tree with all the pearls of sorrow amongst its roots. I left them, and only said hello to the god. A grey wolf stalked about in the shadows until I'd left the forest.

I'd felt, even since that first day, that something had been terribly wrong with the whole thing, with the way we got our god. He had dreamt me, though, dreamt me with a simmering lust for blood and a penchant for wandering the forest. The wolf always watches and the tree always shivers, and the people insist the god had gone dormant of his own will. _Besides_ , they always say when I ask, _he still grants a great many of our prayers. Doesn't that mean he's still looking over us?_ I wonder if they prayed for a boy who'd never leave them, if that was why I had stayed through the ages and heard the changes in his story. They explain away the statues by saying that they're merely a representation of the way he'd sacrificed himself to some ancient threat, given away his freedom for theirs. I don't believe them. I cannot believe that the god who dreamt me into being would've given himself for them: he held too much for the wolf and I to give anything at all for the villagers. It doesn't fit him.


	2. I'm endlessly lost in you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> some nervousness and jealousy, cursing, vulagarity

The day the stranger visits he tells me I might as well call the place a city. Or maybe it's himself that he's saying it to, as if perhaps it's been quite a while. "It has grown far past the limits of a village," he murmurs as he walks. I stare for a moment before following him, curious. "Should call it a city now, and yet..." He stops for a moment, and then whirls around to face me. His gentle, handsome face scrunches up in a scowl, and a growl rumbles up from his chest. His hair is a curly grey that I remember well, and I cannot stop myself from stepping closer, from dragging a gentle hand down his jaw, from the line of his neck to the firmness of his chest. He splutters in surprise, eyes blown wide and confused. 

"Y-Yonghee?" He remembers, then. He must not have seen me in Jinyoung's dreams, must only have felt my fleeting caresses. I hadn't recognized him in the forest, either. I smile gently at him, and he grasps at me with desperate hands. Hurried fingers in my hair, a rough palm down my arm, strong fingers against my waist, calloused fingers running down my nose and swiping across my lips. "I can feel him," he murmurs. He looks to the ground. "You visited him, too. In the forest." He looks up at me with tears shining in his lashes and I smile, nodding quietly. The kiss he presses to my lips is gentle and warm, a warmth I've missed, a warmth I've craved. 

"How have you been, Chan? It's been a great long while since I saw you." He blushes and turns away, embarrassed and bashful. Guilty, too. 

"I thought... if he ever came back, I wanted to be ready for him. I wanted to help him, provide for him. I wasn't sure if you'd ever make it out of the dreams, and... you didn't smell the same, outside of them. That's why I..." Chan looks away again, his throat bobbing as he swallows the shudder of a sob. "But I... I have enough money for all three of us, now. And you... I can get blood for you, easily, or you can have mine. His, if he wants it. A-agrees to it, I mean." The griset is blushing even more heavily now, radiant in the sunlight in the middle of the sidewalk. Chan has always been awkward about those things, has never really wanted them for himself. He's always wanted the gentle touches and soft caresses, though, the warmth of joined hands. Sometimes even just a bit more, but not often. He's sweet about it. 

"It's okay, Chan, to not have recognized me. I didn't either," I tell him quietly. I pull him closer and wind my arms about his neck, pressing another kiss to his lips. It's still slow, still gentle, but it's full of apologies, and then acceptance, and then it's just like coming home after a long day. I pull away with a smile, but something he said plays around in my mind and I frown. My fingers dance against the knobs of his spine as I consider. "But, Chan..." I start, biting my lip as I reconsider once more. He hums quietly, and we stay entirely ignorant of the people around us, all the people staring. "I don't... I don't feel Jinyoung. And... what did you mean, about the blood?" My voice is barely above a whisper, but Chan hears me anyways. He's a wolf, after all. He sighs, eyes incredibly sad.

"About Jinyoung... he's with you. I can feel him, can feel the roots he's set in you. He's watching over you as best he can, but... well, you know as well as I that he..."

"Yeah," I murmur, pressing another gentle kiss against Chan's lips. He hums against me and slips a hand into my back pocket, grinning cheekily. I just shake my head at him before he grows a bit more serious, putting his hand back against my waist. 

"The blood... Yonghee, have you not had any? Ever? It must've been centuries since you left his dreams. Do you not... know?" My silence is answer enough for him, and he sighs before finally seeming to realize we're still in view of the public. He immediately scowls and grabs my elbow, pulling my arms down from around his neck. "Let's go somewhere else. Somewhere traitors don't run rampant," he mutters, nearly growling at the passing people. His grip lightens within seconds, and then he moves an arm around my waist, slipping his hand into my side pocket. It's more for the closeness than anything. Chan has always liked to be as close as possible, crowding into our space with his warmth and his charm. 

When we slip into a car and the man in the front seat starts driving away, I turn to Chan. "Did you know that their story of Jinyoung has changed?" Chan kind of tenses up before shaking his head. The look he sends me very clearly expresses his desire to be told. "They used to know that they chained him. That they... held to him so tightly that he could not run. But now..." I huff out a breath and look towards the roof of the car. Chan pulls me closer, and I set one of my legs over the top of his thigh. He's always been so warm, even in the bleary brightness of the dreams, especially against the frigidness of Jinyoung's skin. Jinyoung always brought the kiss of winter with him. "Now, they... they think he went to sleep willingly. They think he sacrificed himself for them, to protect them from some ancient threat."

"It's _bullshit_ ," Chan growls, a stark contrast to my quiet voice even in my ears. I hum in agreement and set a kiss to his lips. He melts, sighs, hums back. I giggle at the feeling of the vibrations against my lips. Chan pulls back to nose and my neck, and I sigh and lean against the seat of the car. He gathers me close, running his fingers through my hair in contentment. He must've been lonely all this time without us. He must be thinking the same thing about me, because he asks, somewhat nervous, "Yong-a, you haven't... done this with anyone else, have you?" I giggle and shake my head. 

"Never. To the... city, I guess, I've always just been the boy who never left. I think... I think at first, Jinyoung dreamt me for the village. But by the time I was born of the golden pool, that was no longer why he dreamt me. But, to the village, to the city, I wasn't... a person. Not someone to look at with love or desire. I was just... a wish. A symbol of their god. A sign that they were still being heard. You don't... people don't want things like that, you know? Not when that's all someone is to them."

"People can still..." 

"They didn't. Not me," I tell him quietly, reassuring as best I can. It's been a very long time since I talked to anyone. He smiles in relief and goes back to nosing at my neck, dragging invisible lines on my skin. I giggle once more when his tongue flickers out to taste my skin, and he presses a kiss to my neck with his little hum of a laugh afterwards. 

"The drive is kind of long. I'm the next city over--I just, y'know... couldn't be here, after a certain point. My guess is that you only lasted this long because you weren't alive to live through it yourself. I was, and I didn't help, and I regret it. But you... Yong-a, you really don't know you're a vampire?" The word resonates through me, erases everything else he'd just said. 

"Oh. I guess I am." He just scoffs quietly and continues his little task, keeping me gathered close like a treasured plushie. His blood thrums hotly through his veins, naturally warmer than any other person's. I think Chan's heart might be bigger, too, because his blood moves faster than anyone else's I've ever heard. No one's blood ever smelled that good, and no pulse was ever too awfully attractive. Chan's is different. I wouldn't mind drinking it, tasting it, smelling its richness in the air. I gently wrap my fingers around his wrist and pull it towards my mouth. He whimpers slightly but does nothing. I press soft kisses to his wrist--to the slim veins and stiff tendons lurking there, just under his skin, to the bones beneath that and to his heartbeat racing faster than a jackrabbit--and inhale the scent of his blood, so much stronger with his blood so close to the open air. It'd be easy to bite down, let his blood touch the air and spread its alluring scent. I don't, though. Bite him, that is. I don't want to make a mess. So I take a page from Chan's book and settle for smelling him, occasionally licking the tender, blazing hot skin. He hums happily every time I do, occasionally taking a break to remind me that I _can_ bite him, if I want. I just hum in return, shorter and softer. 

"It's so nice to have you back," he murmurs into my skin as the car stops. He sighs longingly, achingly. "It's been so long. Too long." I hum in agreement, glad to have one of my missing pieces back. I climb over him, out of the car, and Chan follows easily. Somehow, in the time between me leaving the car and his own exit, he'd put on a cap, a black mask, and a pair of sunglasses. He hastily shoves a wide-brimmed hat on my head, one I'd seen the driver give him about two seconds ago, and directs my gaze to the ground before pulling me along quickly. Within a few steps, the shutters of cameras start going off, the rapid-fire clicking almost unbearable even after living in the (comparatively smaller) city for centuries as it grew. "Sorry for forgetting to warn you, Yonghee," Chan tells me as we dodge camera-people, almost every one of which is throwing wide-ranging questions at Chan. Many of them pertain to me. "To be honest, I kind of forgot about this." The comment is said with a laugh, thrown over his shoulder like it doesn't matter. That he forgot suggests it really might not. 

"I trust it has something to do with all your money?" Chan's eyes scrunch up in laughter, and my own eyes crinkle up as well with barely contained laughter. Chan lets go and rushes to open the door for me, pushing me through faster with a hand on the small of my back. Once inside, he takes off his hat and ruffles up his hair; I can't help but be enraptured by the way the silky locks move against each other. God, he's so beautiful, so much so that I can't believe I forgot him. But then he takes off the mask and he smiles, and-- _oh. I remember that._ He begins to lead me somewhere else in the building, ignoring the woman at the counter. 

"Yeah, so uhm. All the cameras. I'm actually... I'm a performer. I produce songs with a couple friends, and we perform it sometimes. People like us I guess, so... yeah, I've got a lot of money and a fuck ton of camera-people on my doorstep. Oh, and--"

"Channie!!" The boy who comes out of the door at the end of the hall has chubby cheeks and wild brown hair. He barrels into Chan, presses a sloppy kiss to his cheek, and then freezes when he looks past Chan and sees me. "Uh."

"Yes. Please explain the... brunet to me, Chan." He kind of tenses up, and I don't blame him. I'm not sure I've ever spoken so coldly to anyone. 

"He--"

"Chan, why are the camera... oh."

"Everyone please, uh, calm down. Let's go back inside and then I will explain. I'm bad at that, apparently." I scoff and sweep past him, suddenly very jealous. "Yonghee--" I send a glance over my shoulder as I walk, sure it's more of a sharp-eyed glare. The apartment is nice. I can smell which things belong to Chan and which belong to the other two, the brunet with the soft cheeks and the noiret with the nasally voice. 

"Nice place, I guess." 

"You guess?!" One of the other two shouts in a kind of indignation. I shrug and nod, arms crossed over my chest. 

"I mean, yeah? I haven't, y'know, been in a lot of houses beforehand." I can see the question in the brunet's face and sigh. "I just kinda wander. Don't need to sleep, don't need to eat. I just go with the flow, or whatever. Most times I go to the forest. The stories are all the same and the statues are... ha." I walk over to the wall of windows and sit down with my legs crossed, leaning my forehead against the cool glass. "Chan, do they know?"

"Uh, kinda? Not really. Look, Yonghee, they aren't--"

"Know what," the brunet demands. Every word that comes out of his mouth sounds indignant and horribly aggrieved. Chan gives a sheepish smile. 

"That's Han Jisung. He doesn't like being out of the loop, which is why he asks so many questions. But, Yonghee, I'm not-- I'm not dating either of them. I haven't kissed either of them--"

"Have too!"

" _Romantically_ ," Chan hisses, whipping around to glare at Jisung. Jisung goes bright red and mimes zipping his lips. "The other guy is Seo Changbin. I told you I make music with my friends and perform it: well, these are those friends. It's kind of a company thing, kind of more convenient for us to live together like this. We write practically all of our music together, so it's a lot easier to bounce ideas off each other if we live together. They're just friends, real good friends. Don't worry about romantic stuff with them, okay?" I glare at them for a few moments longer before smiling. 

"Neat. Also, take off the sunglasses, Chan. We're indoors." The wolf giggles helplessly as I pull the glasses from his face. "Now, you should probably explain me to your friends." After a pause, I narrow my eyes at Jisung. "That one is wearing your shirt." He looks shocked that I know that. 

"Ah, yeah. Jisung is pretty affectionate with his friends, so that's normal for him. But, uhm, guys, this is Kim Yonghee. He's... well, it's pretty complicated how I know him, but you could say we're boyfriends?" He looks to me for confirmation and I stare for a few moments, wide-eyed and blushing. He bites his lip and I nod frantically. 

"And what's that _other thing_ we don't know," Changbin asks quietly. Jisung steps up, nodding vigorously. 

"Yea! We don't care that you have a secret boyfriend--"

"Two, actually," I cut in cheerfully. Both of them stare at me before looking to Chan, who nods sheepishly, cheeks stained the brightest red imaginable. The entire room smells of his blood. I think I'm gonna swoon, especially with him so close. 

"Okay, sure. We don't care that you've got two secret boyfriends, but this other thing feels fairly important. So, as your group-mates and fellow producers, I think we should get to know as well." Chan sighs heavily and drags a hand down his face. 

"Okay, here's the thing. At first, I hid it because, well, y'know. It's a thing most people hide. And I was only trying to get somewhere for when I found, uh--" He glances at me and wets his lips. "Yeah. But after that, I kind of had to hide it? I didn't really want to. At this point I'm not even trying to hide it, you two are just kind of oblivious."

"So, what is it?" Chan is biting his lip so hard that I'm afraid he's going to bust it, so I sigh heavily and stand up. Chan whines as I leave his side, stalking over to the other two boys.

"Channie is a wolf, and I'm a vampire. The other boy we're dating is a god. He dreamt me into existence and dreamt Chan into immortality." It takes a second for it to click for both boys. 

"Oh! So by stories and statues, you meant--"

"Yeah. The next city over, by the forest. I hate those fuckers. Damn traitors can eat my left foot," Chan mutters angrily. 

"Don't worry about that. Chan is still, understandably, very upset by... by what the villagers did to Jinyoung. I didn't quite live it so I can't feel anywhere near as connected to it, can't feel near as angry about it, but I _am_ still mad at them, y'know. I've heard their stories, heard them change as they took the blame off themselves. They're-- they're selfish. Humans always are," I whisper. Changbin nods thoughtfully, but Jisung; Jisung opens his mouth and asks:

"So, are you and Chan gonna have hot vampire-werewolf sex now?"


	3. Giving you my neck as if I'm used to it

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> mentions of blood, violent murder, shattered glass and having injuries from it, falling from a five-story window (yonghee is fine), unpleasant metaphors for being beaten up, lots of death (of bad guys)

It takes a good few hours for Chan to re-exit his room, during which time I explained that Chan never really felt like that towards anyone, for as long as I knew him. I did tell Jisung that I might drink Chan's blood and make out with him, though. "Chan does have tasty blood and nice lips, after all." Both of them looked kind of shell-shocked at learning that. "What? You really didn't know?" They both shook their heads. 

"I mean, to be fair, he never said anything to suggest he _would_ have sex, but we've talked about it around him plenty," Changbin murmured, arms crossed with a hand on his chin. I'd shrugged. 

"He's kinda just, like that, ya know? He's not gonna stop you if it seems like you're having fun, and he doesn't mind talking about it. Or, listening, I guess. He just likes being as close as you'll allow him. Might be a wolf thing. He _does_ like to, uhm, watch certain things. Be close while we... I mean, Jinyoung and I, while we like, make out. Chan can get pretty tactile, like you, Jisung." The brunet had nodded, looking thoughtful. "If it went, uh, farther than that, he'd... kinda back off, stay near but like, braid flowers together."

"Flowers? Now that I think about it, that's almost painfully Chan," Jisung said. I couldn't help my smile. I opened my mouth to agree, but Changbin said something says first. 

"Would you like to tell us about Jinyoung? It sounds like you really miss him." I bit my lip and then nodded after a moment.

"I suppose I should start by telling you how Jinyoung became a god."

"He didn't start out as one?" I'd already stopped paying attention to them, and I couldn't tell who asked. I shook my head and pursed my lips. 

After a moment, "No one starts as a god. Gods are formed of belief, not fact. Before the city was a city, it was a village. The people who built it moved there because of all the trees in the vast forest. It'd provide for them for years in terms of lumber alone. They felled trees and built homes. Only... the trees in this forest had waking spirits. They were dryads. The dryads became very angry, and they marched their trees to war. But Jinyoung... he stopped them. He left his tree, dark and shaking in the still air as he stood helpless in front of them, begging them not to attack the ignorant humans. They came to the agreement that if the humans needed more wood, they'd go to the forest and call out his name, after which he'd come and lead him to those trees who were willing to give themselves up for the good of the forest." I couldn't help the bitter twist to my lips. 

"They tricked him," I told them quietly, my whispers fogging up the glass in front of me. I didn't remember walking to the window at the time. "They called out his name and came not with axes and teams of horses, but with rope and a bag. He ran, and they chased him, and they caught him. I'm sure you're wondering why they... but it's just a matter of human nature. They saw him, when he saved them, and they thought he was beautiful, and so they caught him. They dragged him to an ancient altar and left him tied up, and they dropped him into a pool of gold. They didn't untie him. He nearly drowned. But the pyramid of the altar collapsed, and the villagers gathered to watch, and they began to worship the boy they'd stolen. He rose out of the gold a god, and ever after, the gold would not harden. It was that pool of gold that I found myself in when I left his dreams. His eyes had turned to gold, and he was coated in it from head to toe. They pulled him out and led him to the village, giving him their demands the whole way. He soaked everything up and... tried to live up to that. To their expectations for their new god." I stayed silent for a moment, unable to stop the tears. "Do you know how hard it is, being a new god?" Neither of them said anything, and I'd sniffled. Then Chan came out, probably sensing my sadness with some wolfish instinct of his. He'd settled at my side and hadn't left since, taking over the story for me. 

"He was bound to fail from the start," Chan says quietly. "He was a creature of the wild, a being who was supposed to live unfettered. He'd been given chains, ones he felt he couldn't escape. He tried to please the people who worshipped him, but... human greed makes that an ever-unreachable goal. They always want more, always have, always will. When he finally began to fail--because he had to figure all of this out on the fly, had to make it up as he went, with only the will of the people to go off of--he tried to leave them. They refused to let him go. They dragged him to an isolated place and chained him up. I've been there, once in his dreams. His anguish has made the place cold and desolate, and there's a snowstorm there that never stops. The people erected statues of him, in rags and chains, and soon they changed their own story. They now believe that their god gave up his freedom for them, to protect them from a very old danger, and is now locked in a frozen coffin of glass. I've been there too, the day before he dreamt Yonghee. He... no matter where he goes, he cannot escape the cold. I think it might be his way of trying to lock himself away from them." Chan glances at me and sighs, pulling me closer. 

"Yonghee thinks that Jinyoung dreamt him to fulfill a wish from the people," Chan says quietly, painfully. 

"A wish to have someone who'll never leave them."

"Jinyoung dreamt you because something we needed was missing. You were always there, just not... like this. Not until he really dreamt you. When you rose from that pool of gold... he dreamt the entire day, and dragged me in as well. I wasn't quite human at the time, and faces were hard. That's why I only recognized Yonghee today, despite having seen him many times before now. He only touched me today, and I would never forget his touch. But, that dream. We watched you rise. Jinyoung believed that if that gold touched you, you would be cursed a god like he was. That's why it couldn't hold onto you. He never wanted to lose track of you now that you were outside the dream--maybe he knew you would never sleep again--so he sent vines to you, ones you couldn't see. He was sorry for it, you know. But he was desperate. The vines encircled you, caressing, cherishing, apologizing before digging deep and setting his roots in you, binding you to him. That's how I felt him, why you don't. They're--he's--a part of you, which is why you can't feel Jinyoung." Chan sighs for a moment and presses a kiss into my hair. "Jinyoung didn't quite want to do it, but the vines... they loved you too. They're something like representations of his innate desire, and I guess he spends so long trying to lock everything up as an escape from the 'his people', they have their own will now. They didn't want Jinyoung to lose anything more." Everything is silent for a moment, and then... crying. I turn around and find both of the other boys sobbing their little hearts out. 

"Uh." This is confusing. "Are you guys... okay?" Jisung shakes his head quickly, and Chan sighs. "How do we... stop that?"

"Jisung is a lot easier. He just needs cuddles. Changbin... I don't know. He's always just cried until he's done, so..." Chan pauses for a moment before smiling. "Technically, vampire saliva has a sedative in it. If Changbin's okay with it, we can try that." I don't expect the noiret to agree at all. But then, there's a quiet, "Yes please," that quivers pitifully. So Chan gets up and goes to cuddle with Jisung, pulling him into his arms and plopping onto the couch with a cushion between them and Changbin. I awkwardly walk over, and Changbin lifts his arms towards me like a child asking to be picked up. I expect to have trouble when I go to pick him up, but he's either much lighter than I expected or I'm much stronger than I realized. Out of shock, I kind of just hold him mid-air for a few seconds. 

"Oh," Changbin murmurs. He's still crying, but there's a shocked--maybe awed--quality to his voice. It makes me blush profusely, and I immediately turn around and sit on the couch. It's warm from his body heat, and it's nice. Changbin moves his legs from behind my back so that he's kind of straddling my lap. By the time we're sitting, he's only sniffling. 

"Chan, I think I found a good way to make Changbin stop crying," I say with a smirk. I don't know where the sudden desire to tease came from. Changbin blushes just as red as me, but then his face becomes confused. 

"If you're a vampire, why can you blush?" Chan is the one who answers. 

"Well... Jinyoung had never met a vampire when he dreamt of Yonghee. So Yonghee isn't quite... right in terms of other vampires. He can walk in the sun, and he has remarkable control. He's been around for at least five hundred years, and he's never once drank blood. I think that... Jinyoung maybe gave him blood of his own too, though he's not as warm as a human is. Just, things like that. Little things." Changbin is silent for a moment. 

"But, you trust him with us?" Chan nods, and Changbin smiles before turning to me. "Then, even though I'm not crying anymore, I'm still okay with you biting me. It'd be nice to relax." He quiets for a moment before whispering, "And if you feel like drinking my blood, that's okay too." Everyone in the room aside from Changbin splutters, who looks vaguely embarrassed. Silence reigns after everyone calms, and I bite my lip. 

"I don't quite know how to... I've never done this before. Not outside the dreams." Chan smiles softly and scoots closer, pulling Jisung with him. 

"I'll help," he murmurs. He's quiet for a moment before, "If you're gonna drink his blood, his neck would be better. If you aren't, his shoulder should be fine. It'll bleed less." I nod, thinking for a moment. I glance up at Changbin and then nod to myself before pulling him closer, gently wrapping his legs around me again. I carefully pet through his hair and try to look for any signs of nervousness. He doesn't look like he's going to change his mind. "You can do like, uh, like I did in the car." Chan blushes as Changbin tries to look at him--I put a hand on his jaw and turn him back to facing me. Jisung is quiet and sleepy in Chan's arms, though his drooping eyes are fixed on us. "Just kind of go with whatever feels right. Don't be afraid to back out if you feel like it." I nod and lean forward, taking a moment to just smell his blood. It's not as hot or fast as Chan's, but it has its own appeal. Changbin's blood smells earthy and rich. I can't help but sigh. "Does he smell good," Chan asks quietly, urging me on. I nod against Changbin's neck. "Changbin won't bite you."

"I mean, he can if he wants--"

"I might, you don't know," Changbin sasses. Chan bursts into laughter and Jisung grumbles. I nose over Changbin's neck, and he sighs quietly, shuddering a little. I search for a good place to bite, occasionally flicking out my tongue or mouthing at his neck. Changbin is all quiet sighs and little shivers, though he's still fairly upright. Changbin is short and stocky, a whole lot of coiled muscle sat firmly in my lap. I don't even know when my hands came to rest on his hips. When I find a place I think will work, I experimentally scrape my teeth across his skin. Even then, he doesn't try to back out. I carefully sink my teeth into his skin and find them sharper than I thought. He lets out a breathy, barely there whimper and squirms in my lap for a moment before melting completely, like dead-weight against my chest. I lean back into the couch and he goes with me easily. I move one of my hands to his hair, tilting his head a little and running my fingers through his soft, dark hair. He wraps his arms around me, pulls me closer as he burrows his head into my neck. I pull blood from the wound slowly, enjoying the taste of it in my mouth. Changbin smells good. I jump a little when he nips at my neck, but I can feel the smile against my skin afterwards. I giggle into his skin, pulling a sigh out of him. He sounds happy and content. 

Changbin's breath comes in little puffs against my neck, soft and quiet. His heart is pounding, so I doubt he'll be able to sleep. I start kind of rocking side to side, trying to calm his heart. He starts humming, weak and high. My other hand drifts to his thigh, and I'm surprised to find that my hand doesn't span the whole width. Chan starts giggling. 

"Yeah, Changbin likes to work out with me. Stocky little bastard has some thighs, huh?" I nod gently, and Jisung sighs longingly. I pull away, watching the blood welling up from the bite mark as Changbin whimpers and squirms. 

"Jisung, you want a taste?" He looks almost mortified at the offer, and I laugh. Changbin keeps whining, no longer all soft and warm. "Binnie, calm down. It's okay. You want me to keep going?" The smile I give him is horribly fond. I'm afraid that I'm already attached to Chan's friends. "Jisung, you can come closer if you want. I only have one mouth, so I can't bite you." Jisung flushes bright red and Chan looks kind of panicked, but I just go back to quietly drinking Changbin's blood. He sighs and collapses against me once more. He's so... he feels like a child, fragile and incredibly trusting. It feels tender and vulnerable, like something I shouldn't be allowed to have. Eventually, Changbin's heart calms and he falls asleep. After a few more pulls, I drift into something dark and peaceful, mindful to lick at the wound a few times to help it heal over. 

It's a dream, I soon realize. I dream of my days, doing what I always do. But... there are strangers in the dream, lurking in the shadows. They're terribly upset with me for some reason. I feel scared for maybe the first time in my life. 

I wake up with my mouth against Changbin's neck, idly mouthing at it in my slow wakefulness. He sighs and shifts closer, winds his legs around me tighter, and--oh.

"Changbin," I whisper into his ear. Nothing. "Changbin, wake up." A little louder, but still nothing. I don't even notice Jisung sneaking up behind us until he shouts right next to us. Changbin startles and wakes up quickly, and my arms around his waist are the only things keeping him from falling off the couch. Jisung cackles despite having nearly been punched right in the face. It seemed that Changbin was fight rather than flight. 

"Huh?" Changbin looks around the room with bleary eyes, which widen when they land on me. "Uh." He glances down and blushes bright red. "Yonghee, I swear this, uh, wasn't-- I mean, last, uh, or yesterday, I didn't feel, uhm, this. My dream wasn't, you, uhm, it was--" His eyes land on Jisung and he freezes the color draining from his face. "I think I'm gonna pass out." 

"I can carry you to the bathroom if you'd like," I offer. Jisung stares curiously as Changbin nods. I stand up and Changbin makes that same squeaky "Oh," and I giggle. "To be honest, Changbin," I say as I move around the couch, Changbin beginning to direct me with soft words, "I didn't know I was this strong either. Considering how much you obviously work out, you must weigh quite a bit. I mean, muscle is really dense, isn't it?" Changbin nods, looking sheepish. 

"Yeah. I mean, I don't weigh _a lot_ a lot, but like, I didn't expect you to be able to pick me up quite so easily. It was, uh shocking. Jisung can pick me up too, but he struggles a bit after about five seconds because he's a bit of a beanpole. Not quite so much as he used to be, but, y'know."

"Mn. Ah, the bathroom. Your ferry ends here, I'm afraid." I let him down as gently as I can, and he smiles gratefully at me before hurrying into the bathroom. Chan opens his door, at the end of the hall, and smiles upon seeing me. He quirks a dark, straight brow when he sees me standing in front of the bathroom. I walk over and kiss him gently, winding my arms about his neck. "Changbin woke up after a dream about Jisung and had a bit of an issue," I whisper against his lips. Chan pulls back, glances around the hall, and pulls me into his room. 

"Yonghee, please don't hint at _that_ around either of them anymore. I-it's a delicate situation at the moment and they're still kind of awkward about it. I don't want them to fight over it or something. I mean, yes, obviously I know they love each other. They're just... unsure about dating because of the dating ban our company has--I'm ignoring that, by the way, and they can eat my foot--and I think Changbin is also unsure about... sex. I mean, for a while it did seem like he's like me, but the thing just now... that's happened kind of a lot recently, and he's been confused." Chan is pacing with his mouth partially covered by his long fingers. 

"And he... told you all of this himself?" Chan stops and looks at me, suddenly very confused. 

"What? No! I can smell it, Yong-a. Wolf nose," he tells me, tapping his nose twice with a proud smirk. The expression fades a bit and he paces a little more. "I'm pretty sure he wants to wait to do anything until he figures i--"

"Chan!" Changbin bursts into the room, warm and flushed with racing blood. He falters a bit upon seeing me, but I leave with a smile and a pat on my shoulder. "I wanted to ask you some questions, if that's okay," I hear Changbin ask as I leave the room. He sounds nervous but excited. Jisung catches me in front of the bathroom and runs at me. I don't have a choice but to catch him when he jumps into my arms. 

"Wah..." he breathes out, surprised at having been caught. "You're seriously strong! You didn't even stumble like Channie does sometimes. Oof, that was like jumping into a brick wall, now that I think about it." The brunet groans a little and pouts, but the smile returns quickly enough that I know he's only joking. "So, what are they talking about?" I have a feeling he might know already, but I shrug and readjust him so that his legs are around my waist instead of my hips. "Oh hey, it feels nice up here. It's so high up!" He bursts into giggles and leans back, but I do my best not to falter. "Seriously, how are you so strong? You didn't even move when I did that!" I shrug and wrap my arms around his waist, spreading my hands against his lower back. 

"I don't know. That's probably because of Jinyoung; he is the one who dreamt me, after all." Jisung's face goes soft and sappy. 

"You love him." I nod with a smile on my face. 

"Yeah. Him and Chan. I wonder... Jinyoung might not wake up, though. He kind of... hates the world, you know. Because of the villagers, their unreasonable expectations and the way they stole him. I think he misses his tree. Over a thousand years separated from it..." I sigh and carefully lean Jisung against the wall, resting my forearms to either side of his head and letting my forehead drop to his shoulder. "There are golden pearls resting about the feet of his tree. Did you know that?" Jisung murmurs a quiet denial. "There are. They're products of his sorrow. Of his anguish. His branches hang low, with the mantle of godhood and the weight of chains. There might be more that drags down his branches, but I don't know what it might be. He always tried to hide that from us in his dreams. But, anyhow--" The door bursts open. Darkness and dread fill the apartment, and I move faster than I realize is even possible as I deposit Jisung in the bathroom and demand he lock the door. I skid back into the living room with a scowl on my face. 

The people who face me have eyes that glow red and pale skin. Before Chan can open his door, I shove a chair under the handle of the door. There are three of them. I know they must be true vampires, those born of a disease and not the dream of a god. I can see it in the depraved hunger that burrows into their bones, suffocating them, demanding they seek out fresh blood. There is a jealous rage settled deep into their eyes; from the way their eyes burn into me, I know the intrinsic hatred is directed at me. 

"He must die," one of them shouts. There's little enough difference between them that figuring out who it was is pointless. 

"Why?" I choke out. I hate to admit it, but I'm well and truly terrified. I can't give out though because maybe, just maybe, they'll leave once they finish with me. 

"Abomination!" It's the only thing they shout before rushing at me in unison. I'm fast enough to dodge the first vampire, an instinct I can't control, but the second barrels into me. The impact feels like it shatters all the bones in my body, and truly, I never knew one person could do anything with so much force. The glass window must be reinforced because the first impact--the one that makes me feel like I'm being beaten into ground beef--doesn't break it. The second vampire throwing himself into us, though, that along with the third (or the first, depending on how you were counting) throwing a fist into the window _does_ break it. Chan busts out of his room and into the main part of the apartment just in time to see me falling among a shower of miniscule shards of glass. They catch the city lights as we fall, and really, they're beautiful in a terrible way. I realize what they meant by calling me an _abomination_ when I realize the sun has gone down, when I remember that I can walk in the sunlight without dying. The other vampires are gone now, probably some other power that those born of disease have. Some part of me refuses to believe that those three are really "proper" vampires, can't believe that something so terrible can exist. That must mean that Chan is also wrong in some way, isn't a proper wolf--or, well, _werewolf_ , I suppose.

Chan's apartment wasn't terribly high up, only four or five floors. Still, it feels like my bones are ground into dust when I hit the sidewalk; adrenaline urges me to my feet regardless when I see the dark blurs above me, glowing streaks of red that I know to be blood-crazed eyes. I don't think--there's no time to do so. I just run in whatever direction feels right, pushing myself to go as fast as possible. The world becomes a blur, and soon my body begins to ache. I can hear them chasing after me, relentless in their hatred and their need to rid the world of me. In Jinyoung's dreams, I never knew fear or pain. I almost wish I'd never left. 

Before I know it, I'm running through the trees. I know the forest like the back of my hand, like the paths of Chan's heart. I can hear the thuds and cracks of the others running into trees in the darkness as I make my way ever deeper, closer and closer to Jinyoung's tree. When I reach it, I roll my ankle on some of the golden pearls. I go down heavily, lying there for maybe half a second before pushing myself to my knees. I try to stand, but my ankle can't support my weight at all. I reach for the tree, for Jinyoung, desperate for the boy who dreamt me. It starts to rain, and the freezing droplets wash over and through the cuts on my face, tracing the shapes of glass in my skin. 

" _Jinyoung_ ," I wail when I can no longer bear it any longer. "Help m-" Somehow, I'd already forgotten how hard the other vampires could hit; I remember quickly when one of them sends me flying with a fist to my temple. I curl in on myself as tightly as I can, screaming and wailing for Jinyoung. I almost begin to think he can't hear me after all, that he isn't really there or doesn't really care, but then I hear the rattling of chains. Two of them shoot out from amongst the dense forest, snapping the necks of the vampires that they wrap around. Their limp bodies are pulled back and Jinyoung shoots forth from the forest, pinning the last one against his own tree and choking the life out of her. He throws her away before turning to me, the anger on his small, sharp-angled face morphing into heart-wrenching concern. Before he can move closer, though, there's more rustling from the woods. I continue to cower on the ground as he moves to stand over me, eyes focused on the darkness between the trees. Just before the next round of vampires, another version of Jinyoung barrels out from amongst the trees and burrows into the one bound by broken chains. I guess, after the villagers made a new story for his end, Jinyoung was forced into a parallel, and now the mirrored versions had finally become one once more. Frost crept down the chains as pale, red-eyed vampires poured from the darkness.

Jinyoung stands alone against the flood of bodies, his blue-black hair damp from the rain. He moves too much for any of the water to stick, uses too much of it as a weapon as he sends frozen, dagger-sharp shards into the overwhelming crowd. He whips the chains back and forth, sending a spray of metal and ice from the ends as he lops off heads and cuts bodies in two. The trees surrounding us begin to waver as vines shoot forth, wrapping around ankles and crushing bones as they wind higher. The rain freezes as it falls upon the crowd, collecting into foot-long spikes that pin vampires to each other and the ground, but never the other trees. A golden light begins to radiate from Jinyoung, and its pleasant warmth washes over me like the warmth of Chan's body, like the safety of Jinyoung's dreams. I fall asleep watching vampires cower away from him, from the burning force of the light he shoves into their faces. My lips quirk into a smile at the sight of him, so beautiful with his eyes glowing golden and his hair stirring in a playful breeze I can't seem to feel. As the strands lift and play in the wind, they go as gold as his eyes. I think it's only my weak grasp on his ankle that keeps him from floating away into the sky.


	4. That momentary, sweet touch

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> more mentions of blood

I wake nestled amongst shimmering pearls of sorrow, my feet bare and my body aching as I stare up at gilded branches and golden leaves. The branches don't seem to hang quite so low anymore. As my lips spin a story of delight, Jinyoung's anxious face comes into view. His eyes have mellowed into amber, but the waves of his hair blend into the golden tree above him. He looks older than he used to, I think, although I can barely recall seeing his face in his dreams. I go to raise my hand, but he uses a surprising strength to keep my arm against the ground. He bites his lip and continues to stare, his expression smoothing more and more into one of relief with every passing second. He sighs and lets go, and I can finally raise my arm to thumb over his delicate features. He's no longer the boy of the village stories. He's the man that survived their betrayal and their lies, the ones they told to avoid their own guilt. My thumb drags over his bottom lip and he shivers, opening his mouth and gently biting my finger. I giggle and pull my thumb away.

"I'm the vampire here, Jinyoung." A thought occurs to me after a moment, and I card my fingers through his now-golden hair to disguise my worry. "Are you okay, sun?" He smiles and leans into my touch, answering me through the reassurance in his eyes. He pulls me to sitting after a few moments, setting me carefully in his lap. It echoes back to having Changbin on my lap, to when I drank his blood. Jinyoung's eyes fill with sorrow for a moment and the tree sends a few new, golden pearls to rest at my back. They're bigger, and I know this sorrow isn't the result of something minor. I cup my hands to his face, feel the dried tracks of tears long-since shed. He turns a bit and presses a kiss to my palm, smiling as best he can. "Jinyoung, what's wrong?"

"I'm sorry," he croaks out, "to you and to Chan. I couldn't keep you safe in my dreams. I didn't mean to let either of you out. I never wanted you cursed to eternity in this world like I was." He opens his eyes again, and I wonder what color they used to be. I wonder how long it will take me to forget the color of his dark tree, his dark hair; I wonder if I'll ever be able to forget. "I'm sorry for... well, no. I'm not sorry for dreaming you wrong because I don't think I could ever love one of those beasts from last night, but I _am_ sorry for not dreaming the rest of them out of existence." I smile and shake my head at him.

"You did nothing wrong. I'm glad you dreamt me. I'd have had no one else do so but you.”

* * *

  
It's weird, for a while: being able to see him, to see his frost-pale face. I'd brought it up first when I held his hand for the first time, wrapped my fingers in his worn, calloused palms; "Your hands are so cold... and you're so much paler than me." A bitter smile, and then, "I used to be as tan as you, before they locked me away. I used to be... warmer. Not as much as Chan, not when my tree is near the center of the forest, but more like you. It was cold in either place and both were dark and desolate. But... it's okay. I'm back with you now. We'll rejoin Chan soon." A small smile, one meant to be treasured. A secret smile filled with unimaginable joy, so much that it's unmatchable for anyone who hasn't gone through what he has. "The villagers didn't weave this part of the story. I broke free of their belief. I... I'm no longer their god." He pressed a kiss to my lips, one rampant with exhilaration, and we fell together into the pile of golden pearls, some of which had begun to sprout into flowers and grasses and trees, exotic life with bark and leaves and petals gilded in gold and joy that neither of us could crush.

It's weird for even _longer_ to be able to touch him, to feel his perpetually chilled skin under my fingertips, the lean, solid curvature of muscle against my chest or my back when we lie close together, hardly daring to move as we bathe in each other's presence. For as much as I had hardly seen him in the dreams, I had (even more so) rarely ever touched him. He smiled fondly, softly, as he let me run my fingers over his maybe-too-sharp features. Being close once more to his tree was helping, though, and I could feel his cheeks slowing filling out, getting chubbier and softer. Even that couldn't hide the sharpness of his cheekbones and jawline though. No matter how long and unruly his golden hair was, his amber eyes were still visible, almost glowing under the shaded boughs of his tree. After a thorough, gentle wash, his hair is soft and shines like real gold. It falls about his shoulders, showcasing his face like an expensive picture frame. When he tucks it behind his ears so I can see his face better--so he can see better, he always insists with a joking grin on his lips, something that's gradually become more common--wisps of it fall in his face like the threads of a dissipating cloud. Some nights, I lie next to him and just look, finding all the different shades and tints in his pretty eyes, unable to stop myself from comparing them to all the precious gems I've ever seen; all of them fall short compared to his vibrant, expressive, amber eyes.

The most familiar thing is hearing him. He often sang the two of us into peace in the dreams, and he picked the habit back up after rescuing me from the natural vampires. His voice is smooth and soothing, something beautiful and intangible even as it wraps around me like a blanket, blocking out everything that could possibly bring me harm. He cards and pets through my hair as he sings, something new, while holding me close to his chest as I sit in his lap. He rocks back and forth, gentle and sweet. His blood, those rare times I ask to drink (and he always lets me, no matter what the reason I asked), is slower and thicker than Chan's, more like ice cream that's just begun to melt. I can hear it even when I don't drink, can hear the way his human-given heart beats slow and steady, much slower than any human's. I think it partially a result of his imprisonment in desolation and hellish cold, partially a result of his origins as a dryad. Before he had anything like blood, he had sap running through his veins, a heart right in his core that pushed it through gentle but insistent. He tells me things like this sometimes, as I drink of his sweetened, chilled blood. I find the metaphor of honey when he brings me to visit a very old colony, the bees of which were descendants of those who'd lived there before he was thrust into godhood. Honey is sweet and thick and _golden_ , and it reminds me of the taste of his blood, slow and smooth down my throat.

It is only tentatively that Jinyoung goes with me into what used to be the village that stole him, trapped him, cursed him. I tell him about face masks, but he drapes a veil of golden flowers and vines around his ears; they lay prettily across the bridge of his nose, the still living vines winding about his ears and amongst his hair. After a bit of coaxing, the vines go a bit black and the flowers go a bit red. His clothes from who-knows how long ago were tattered rags near to falling apart, so I'd snuck into the city and snagged some clothes about his size from a clothesline. He furrows his brows at me upon seeing that the jeans are ripped, but I assure him it's normal for people to wear such clothes these days. He nods seriously and accepts it as just another thing that's changed while he's been gone.

When we wander into the city, it takes maybe five minutes to come upon the first of many statues dedicated to him. He stops in place and just stares for a while, disbelief and terror and despair on his face. "How," he murmurs. Tears begin to fill his eyes. "How were they ever able to convince themselves of something else?" He sounds entirely hopeless until I finally grab him by the shoulders and turn him around, pulling him close to my chest. I wrap my arms about him and pet through his hair, letting the vines tangle about my fingers. No one stops to watch as they walk their daily paths, something that both does and doesn't surprise me. The people here, for a long time, have kept to themselves; I barely remember the time when the village was still only barely a town, when there were few enough people that you could know everyone to some degree. However, for the longest time, people had always stopped to stare at me with some kind of smothered reverence in their eyes, like they could somehow feel that I was something of their god.

"Children will believe most anything they're told, Baejin, especially when it's their parents saying it." I sway with him gently, trying to rock him into a calmer state of mind. He pulls back a little so he can look into my eyes, so I can see that his eyes are bright with anguish.

"Yonghee... I think, though I'm not sure, that part of the reason I dreamt you was... to fulfill some wish they had. I despised them, but I... I couldn't--"

"I know." He sputters at me, utterly confused. I smile gently and press a kiss to his forehead, giggling at the tickle of petals against my chin. "I know, Baejin. I've always known that you, in part, dreamed of me for them. They wanted a boy who'd never leave them." I pull him closer, close enough that I can whisper straight into his ear. I don't want anyone but Jinyoung to hear me say, "They didn't get what they wanted." Jinyoung crushes me closer, his face buried in my chest. It shouldn't be so easy for him to make himself so small. He shouldn't be able to hide away from the world like this, not when we're the same height. But it's okay because it soothes him enough that we can make a short tour of the half-dozen parks in the city, Jinyoung clutching my hand and pressing into my side the whole way, almost like a shy child hiding behind his mother's skirts.

We visit a cat shelter on the way back, and the calendar has a bunch of X's over the squares. I ask the woman at the counter what the circled date is, and she excitedly hands me a flyer. A grin bursts onto my lips as I look over it, and I thank her, quietly counting in my head how many days I'll need to keep track of. Only five. I fold it up and put it into my pocket, and Jinyoung walks up and tugs me out the door a moment later.

When we go back, Jinyoung re-enters his tree for the first time. He sleeps in there for three of the five days, and I rest amongst the golden pearls and plants along with him. They've spread in lightning-arced lines from his tree, and I recall him telling me that ley lines had long since gathered about his tree. I pass the time by trying to dream without sleeping, something I'm sure I've heard of by another name somewhere. I cradle some of the pearls in my hands, giggling as they unfurl into plants that I carefully set to the ground. This entire area of the forest has slowly begun to be taken over by pure, golden light. It shimmers even at night, providing a gentle light that lulls me to sleep easily. The spreading area of golden influence avoids the other trees but has no qualms in taking over the grass at their feet.

Jinyoung comes out to find me with some many-petaled flower cradled in between my hands: the only reason I hadn't set it down yet was because of the little fairy nestled in the center of the petals, a little butter-golden mouse with gossamer wings. When I show him, he smiles and carefully takes the flower from my hands. A gentle breeze picks up as he lifts the flower to the sky, his fingers curling back into a loose fist as he watches it float away on the wind. It's soft, and beautiful, and peaceful. It's almost everything I want; there's only one thing missing.

* * *

* * *

  
[CHAN]  
Concerts are... chaos, inevitably, but are always worth it in the end. It's fun, sometimes, to wear different kinds of clothing, but most of the time the "stylish" clothes chosen by the company's stylists are hot and unwieldy to wear while performing. None of us complain, though, because by the time we get one stage, we're already lost in the rush of performing. 3RACHA, recently one of the biggest producer groups, are one of the only to perform our own songs ourselves. It's always been a bit of a dream--well, ever since I started _really_ performing--to bring Jinyoung and Yonghee to one of our concerts.

When I see a familiar face, and then a flower-veiled face with eyes I'd recognize anywhere, I nearly collapse on the spot. I smile widely, bright and unabashed, right in the middle of a song that's supposed to be charming and sexy. Those are the fuckers I can’t wait to be with again.


	5. EXTRA: yongbaechan at the beach

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> for Zeke: thank you for your comment and request! i hope this works,, feel free to request anything else you might think of!! i really liked this story so i don't mind writing more

It's been wonderful, to have them both. Even if we have to wear masks and hats and sunglasses when we go out, even if we have to sneak out the back just to avoid the reporters. The man in charge of Chan's company had been okay with the three of us, but we wanted him to wait before anyone was told. We wanted our own space and time together for a while. 

The sun is bright on the beach, reflecting off the sand in dizzying waves. This is something Chan introduced to us, something he'd found in his own time. It's something we all love, now, even Changbin and Jisung. Granted, the beach we're on is small and secluded, a secret place that Chan found as a wolf some time ago. Few beyond the five of us know about it, so we're free to take off the masks and walk around in just our swim trunks, free of the worry that reporters and nosey fans can easily induce. Under the influence of the sun, Jinyoung's skin warms ever-so-slowly, becoming farther removed from the kiss of winter every day. He worries sometimes that he's too cold for us, but we wash those worries away with kisses and cuddles, pressing ourselves to as much of him as possible to prove that nothing as simple as a little chill to his skin will ever be enough to keep us from him. 

Jisung and Changbin are already splashing about in the water, laughing and giggling raucously as they attack each other. They're bound to get sunburned because they stood still for about three seconds each upon getting out of the car, just enough time for Chan to spray their faces with sunscreen. Neither of them is the type to stop playing even if they feel like they're getting burned, and it's only ever Chan forcing them to take a break that keeps them from burning completely. Chan himself hums one of their new songs as he sets up beach umbrellas and towels; I try to help, but Chan has it down to an art and I can't really do much but make things worse. He doesn't drive me away, though, just giggles as he fixes my mistakes. 

Once everything is set up, Chan leads Jinyoung and I into the shade and pulls out his (giant, perhaps larger than anyone really needs) tube of sunscreen, a devilish smile on his face. I'm vaguely reminded of a meme Jisung showed me as Chan fills both hands with sunscreen. Why does Chan have two hands? So he can slather his boyfriends in an unnecessary amount of sunscreen. He goes for Jinyoung first because, as we all know, Jinyoung likes the ocean and dislikes sunscreen. He says it blocks his energy, but Chan says he'll turn red as a cooked lobster if he doesn't use it and then his tree will peel, which. Ew. So Jinyoung suffers through it (not really, we both enjoy the pseudo-massages as Chan works the sunscreen in) until the sunscreen has disappeared into his skin. He wiggles excitedly as Chan carefully rubs it into his face, and then he's allowed off. He shoots towards the sea, tackling Jisung into the saltwater. Jisung, being something like a sapling in terms of physical stature, goes down easily. Changbin pulls them out with a mock groan, though there's a smile on his face as he waddles onshore with a boy under each arm. Jisung fans himself and probably says something crude, setting the two prisoners to laughter and Changbin to red cheeks. 

Chan glances back and grins, pausing for a moment to yell, "That better not be a sunburn, Changbin," before slapping his sunscreen-covered hand to my chest. I hiss at him as he grins. "Sorry, Yong-a, you know I gotta. You'll burn super easy, especially since you haven't been quite tan in a few years." He's not wrong. After sort of moving in with Chan, Jisung, and Changbin, I've lost the tan I got over the years of wandering. I don't miss it, though, not when I've gotten to be with Jinyoung and Chan so much. We make sure to take regular trips back to Jinyoung's tree, often on two of the three days of break we managed to squirrel out of the company head. 

Chan is gentle as he spreads the sunscreen across my skin, using the opportunity to also work out any tension in my body with firm fingers. I can't help the quiet whimpers and groans, which makes Chan giggle delightfully. After what feels like forever (but maybe Chan's hands are just magic, _who knows_ ), Chan finally finished with his sunscreening and lets me up. I feel lazy and boneless, but I still do my best to help Chan with his sunscreen in return. He gets his front while I get his back, carefully smoothing it all over his broad back. Chan has such a pretty figure, one I can't help but admire at times like this. I look over his shoulder at the three farther down the beach, unable to help a puff of laughter at the sight of Changbin buried up to his neck in the sand with Jisung and Baejin standing victoriously beside him; well, Jisung is kneeling on top of his buried torso, and Jinyoung stands off to the side with a red scrap of... fabric... held high in the--

"Jinyoung, put your pants back on!" He startles at the sound of my voice as I launch myself over Chan's shoulder. He lets out a quiet _oof_ , and I turn for a moment to call out, "Sorry, Channie!" He has them back on before I'm even halfway there, so I let myself collapse to the sand. It's stressful to be his boyfriend sometimes. Not at times you'd think, like when we have to avoid cameras or showing our faces in public. No, it's when he takes off his swim trunks to use as a victory flag or when he forgets to drink water at the beach and his tree nearly dies of dehydration. Speaking of--

"Jinyoung, come drink some water!" Chan's accent comes through a little stronger this time as he says it. The accent is kind of weird because none of us can figure out why he has it. He just does. We don't even know where it's supposed to be from. 

"Was that an Aussie I heard?" Someone shouts suddenly. We all startle and freeze, and I push myself up to my elbows as I look around. My gaze lands on a freckled face with a big, slightly crooked smile on it. The blond is standing chest-deep in the waves, but he looks entirely unfazed by the push and pull of the water. His gaze slides to Jinyoung in his red trunks, and his smile just gets wider. "Jinyoung! Nice to see you!" I scramble to my feet and rush over, pulling Jinyoung to my chest and wrapping my arms around him. I glare at the freckled blond as Chan walks over and tries to separate me from Jinyoung. He sighs after a moment. 

"Yong-a, be nice. If they're friends, let them talk," he murmurs. The boy moves closer, and if I squint, I can almost see his body coalescing from the water. 

"Uh." The shock of seeing him literally come into being loosens my grip, and Chan finally wrenches my arms free. He wraps them around himself and turns around so I can still watch the stranger while Chan noses at my neck, trying to calm me down. Jinyoung looks awkward where he stands in the sand, and he finally looks back at us with an uneasy smile. I reach out a hand and let him hold it. 

"Hi, Yongbok," he murmurs. The boy in the water cringes and looks away. He glances at all of us--looks _away_ from Jisung digging Changbin out the sand--and then continues walking. Vibrant blue swim trunks show up as he walks until he's ankle deep--well, would be ankle deep, except that I can't see any feet in the water. 

"I go by Felix, now. You've... changed a bit, now that I think about it." Jinyoung scratches his nape and nods, awkward. I forget how shy he gets around strangers because it's been so long since he was like this around Changbin and Jisung. For a good while, he refused to even leave Chan's room. Chan squeezes me tighter just as I'm about to tell the boy not to ask. 

"Yeah, uhm. It's a really long story. Short explanation... I'm a god now? I didn't want it to happen, it just did." The boy-- _Felix--looks astonished._

_"Okay, uh. Yeah, I won't ask. I doubt it was good...." Felix trails off and looks at Chan and I. "So, who're they," he asks, wiggling his brows suggestively. Chan loosens his arms a bit and Jinyoung squeezes my hand, so I know it's my turn to answer now._

_"We're his boyfriends. I'm Kim Yonghee, and this is Bang Chan." The blond smiles._

_"I'm Felix Lee," he says, his voice absolutely cavernous. "The last time I met Jinyoung, he was still just a dryad. _I'm_ still just a water spirit, thank god. I don't think I could handle being anything more." He pauses, looks at Chan and I again. "And what _are_ you two? I can tell that the two in the sand are human." I glance at Changbin and Jisung and find them both partially buried in the sand. Jisung nearly has his face buried in it, but he looks happy regardless. _

_"I'm a vampire and Chan is a wolf. But we're different than the others like us because Jinyoung dreamt us." Felix accepts it easily, and we realize quickly that he and Chan have similar accents. He says that that's what people from Australia sound like._

_"I came up because I've been out in the ocean for a while, and it's been a bit since I heard another Aussie. I got excited." He helps us pull Changbin and Jisung (who'd fallen asleep) from the sand before he leaves, saying he has tides to stir or something. When the water begins to rise a bit, filling the hole the humans were in, it makes sense. We spend the rest of the day under the shade of the umbrellas. Jinyoung lies down first, and sometime later Chan goes and joins him on the towel. He rests his head on Jinyoung's slow-beating heart, enjoying the steady thumping. I stand at the shore for a while, staring out to sea. My toes sink into the sand, and the water sparkles as if filled with diamonds. But eventually, I tire of the sight and turn to one I could never get bored of. Chan and Jinyoung are so incredibly precious that my heart seizes for a moment, a helpless smile making its way onto my lips. I wander over, savoring the sight of them. Jinyoung is taller, but Chan is more muscular. Chan lies curled up against Jinyoung, as near to looking a wolf as he can without actually changing back, and Jinyoung's lazy smile quirks up as he listens to me getting closer. He reaches out a hand, eyes still closed. Chan's breaths are even and slow, and it seems he's fallen asleep. I let Jinyoung pull me down against him, let him pull me into a slow kiss. It's warm and full of love. Chan whines in his sleep and shifts closer, pressing his nose to Jinyoung's chest. He breathes heavily for a few moments before huffing and relaxing once more._

_"Your feet are all sandy," Jinyoung whines quietly. I grin and wipe them off against the towels as best I can before throwing a leg over the both of them. Chan reaches out, his sleep-heavy limbs only making it halfway before falling limply against Jinyoung's chest. I wrap my fingers between his, and he smiles in his sleep. I lean over Jinyoung to press a kiss to Chan's forehead, one to Jinyoung's nose, and then relax against his side. I hope someone has an alarm set, but it won't matter much anyways. This is the second of our three days off this month, and our only plans for tomorrow were to visit the tree with Changbin and Jisung for the first time._

_That can wait, though. For now, I'm content to sleep on a slowly cooling beach as the setting sun washes over us, as close as possible to my favorite people in the entire world._


	6. EXTRA: yongbaechan in dreams

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For cixcix! Thank you so much for the comment, this request was fun! I enjoyed figuring out how they became Them™
> 
> (they got separated from each other because while dreams are perfect, the world is not 👀)

Dreams are almost always perfect. The dreams of a god are perfect with even more frequency, for the gods are skilled at controlling things beyond human grasp. This is why, despite things being half-unreal in Jinyoung's dreams, Chan and Yonghee were content.

* * *

  
[CHAN]  
I was never part of his dreams to begin with. I existed before his godhood, one of the wild wolves that roamed around his first imprisonment. He must have caught a glimpse of me, for days after wandering in that heartless, frigid place, he'd pulled me into his dreams for the first time. He hid his face, but I could feel the way he smiled. I could feel his exuberance at having someone to talk to. I listened as best I could, unfazed by the unfamiliar forest. He talked about the most random things, like an old friend from long ago or the scent of night-blooming flowers. It was peaceful, and beautiful, and comfortable.

The first time I was something like a human, he gently pressed my soul into a body he'd sculpted out of clay. It was a good figure, though a little rough at the edges. He continued smoothing out edges and refining shapes as my body continued to grow more and more human. I could feel his smile, just as I always had, but I felt, too, an inkling of something else, a little to the right, lingering and wondering but not fully there. I was distracted as he carefully pushed me back and forth between bodies, until he finally left me in the one made of clay and watched, delighted, as I molded it down into the form of my wolf. He'd pressed a kiss to my cheek, something feather-light and fond.

I knew, from the first moment that Yonghee's hazy, indistinct form pressed his lips to my neck that he was meant to be a vampire. But Jinyoung had never met one, had only heard stories, and it was those stories that he was using as reference when he carefully molded Yonghee's soul out of light. He worked hard to keep the young spirit together, ephemeral, curious thing that he was. As time went on, Yonghee grew more stable and tangible. His body had a defined form, but there was no color to it. You had to feel it to be able to tell what he might look like. He often caressed my face, enamored in some way with something he didn't quite have of his own. I didn't realize until later that he was just in love and wanted to memorize my features.

For the longest time, we just… existed like that. We were a perfect fit for each other, content to just exist in each other's space or to chatter incessantly while the other two listened or responded. We kissed, and they understood when I said I didn't want to go any farther than that. They simultaneously pressed kisses to my cheeks and giggled, pulling me down into cuddles. Even with Yonghee still formed of light and Jinyoung hiding his face, I knew I loved them, wholeheartedly, with every fiber of my being.

And then, it hit a catalyst, a pinnacle of some point. Jinyoung pulled me into his dreams, entirely unannounced and unexpected. We were hovering above some chamber, the very bottom of which held a circular pool of gold. I knew, eventually, that he was dreaming of Yonghee. But I was a wolf, and this dream was overlapped with reality, and so everything was confusing and echoing and I couldn't recall his face.

Yonghee rose from the pool, dressed in neat clothes and untouched by gold, and he hauled himself from the chamber. Jinyoung's vines cherished him for a moment, apologizing before burrowing into his skin. Later that night, in an exhausted dream, Jinyoung apologized for doing that: for dreaming him out of the dreams--"He won't come back, Chan, he can't. He can't sleep."--and for binding himself to Jinyoung without asking. I smiled soothingly at him.

"It's okay, Jinyoung. We'll find him again some day. And besides that, you know as well as I do that he'd want to be bound to you if he knew. He loves you so dearly. I'm sure he'd never want to truly part."

I knew, from that moment, that sometime in the future we'd all come back together. I knew little of the human world except that a lot of it depended on _money_. I began trying to figure out how to get as much of that as possible so that we could be together without difficulty when we finally came back together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feel free to request scenes in the comments or in my DMS on twitter! @sunwooseok_


	7. EXTRA: yongbae getting scared at a concert/jinyoung angst

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> for completeinx! thank u so much for ur comment and sorry this took a bit to finish,, but i hope u like it!
> 
> there is blood drinking in this one

According to Chan (and Jisung and Changbin, technically), this is their second awards show. Ever. So, this is a really big deal. Chan had said weeks ago that they were going all out for their performance, but what I expected and what I end up seeing are... nowhere close to each other. For one thing, Jinyoung and I had both been expecting the strange clothes--as per usual for 3RACHA's performances along with the other groups (apparently) who'd come--but we hadn't been expecting much more than some pretty makeup like he usually wore. Even seeing the intense looks some of the boys in the other groups--especially another group of three who wore dramatic looks in flares of metallics--didn't prepare us, _especially_ Jinyoung.

Chan looks... _rough_. It's less the dark clothes with all the straps and buckles. It's more that the arm left uncovered by his crimson vest and sleeve of inky black fur is covered in what looks like cuts and scratches. From far away (even though we're in the first few rows, the stage is a few feet up from us), the scratch over his eye looks terribly real. The eye that's been marred has gone a white-blue, and my heart beats fast with something like fear. I can't bring myself to stand up because my legs feel weak. Chan looks like he's been in a bad fight, and I can't imagine what might be hidden under his clothes. But Jinyoung--Jinyoung goes to stand up, terror and blinding concern spread across his face. I realize something is off a split-second later, when I realize Chan doesn't look like he's in pain. He looks the same as always. I grab Jinyoung's arm and pull him back down, nearly having to throw my leg over his lap to keep him from struggling out of my hold. He's surprisingly strong when he wants to be.

"Jinyoung," I murmur, as close to his ear as I can manage without looking suspicious. "Jinyoung, it's okay! I think it's just makeup. Chan is okay!" Jinyoung blinks heavy tears from his eyes, turning to look at me, his eyes wide, wet, and tragic.

"How do you know? How can you be sure! He- he looks-!"

"I know, Jinyoung. But I can't smell any blood. You know I'd be able to smell it, especially his. If he were moving that much while being really hurt, he'd started bleeding again. It's just makeup. It's just to match, uhm, the... the concept? I think that was the word," I mutter. I glance back up at Jinyoung, glad to see he's been slightly mollified. I try to soften my gaze and gently tug at his wrist. "Want help calming down? It'll be more fun to watch if you aren't worried." He bites his lip and nods, letting me carefully pick him up and deposit him in my lap. I look back to the stage for a moment and find Chan looking in our direction. I flash him a smile that almost breaks his "stage face" before pressing a gentle kiss to Jinyoung's neck. He shivers, just a little, just like he always does. I giggle against his skin and he sighs, relaxing just a bit. I stare up at the stage, at Chan's laced-up, knee-high boots and the glove covering up his hand, belt straps around the wrists and fingers cut off at the first knuckles. "He's okay," I murmur. "He's having fun. Thriving, really, up there on the stage. Like he was born to be there." Jinyoung nods and sighs, a happy, quiet thing that tells me he's not worried anymore. Not scared.

By this point, I don't even have to bite him to get him to calm down. Jisung told me it was a biological reaction, and I countered by asking if trees react to being bitten. Jisung had just laughed and wiggled his eyebrows at us. Still, though, Jinyoung shows signs that Jisung was right. Somehow, by expecting to be bitten, his brain had tricked itself into calming down. I still haven't pierced his skin, keeping my teeth and lips grazing against his neck without biting down. Jinyoung keeps his hands on my forearms where they're wrapped around his soft stomach. With a quiet giggle, I flick my tongue out and taste the lingering worry on his skin. He shifts a little, humming to the song they're performing. I've lost count of where they are by now, enjoying the white noise and the view of my boyfriends enjoying himself on-stage. I'm glad he found this while we were gone because I can see most every day how much he loves it.

Sometime later, when 3RACHA have bowed and quickly thanked everyone for cheering them on before leaving, one of the show staff comes and brings Jinyoung and I to their waiting room. They still have the stage clothes and makeup on, staring at the screen as they quietly munch on food. Chan's face lights up when he sees us enter, quickly setting down his plate as he shuffles around Jisung and Changbin, who mutter objections as their view is obstructed. Twice are on-screen: they're a girl group that Jisung and Changbin both like a lot, and it's one of the ones that one of Chan's many friends are in. Chan wraps us up in a warm hug for a long minute before pulling back to cup Jinyoung's face. He looks worried.

"Are you okay, Baejin? I saw you guys earlier, doing the calming thing." Chan talks quietly enough that I doubt the other two can hear him. Jinyoung nods slightly as Chan quickly gets distracted by his squishy cheeks. After nearly a year of being back together and eating the meals Chan insists on cooking (even while he and the other two continue to eat fast food and ramen), Jinyoung has gotten less thin, definitely softer. Chan had done some sort of research to find a good diet for dryads-turned-gods. I'm pretty sure it involved asking Hyunjin, the tall, pretty, grey-haired witch who always seemed to know a bit too much for someone with such a disarming smile.

"We got, uhm, a little spooked by your makeup. We thought you got into a fight; at least, I thought so. I'm not sure what Baejin thought, just that he looked like he was about to Red Seas the crowd to get to you. I realized it had to be makeup for something because I couldn't smell any blood," I explain quietly. I take a hand each before I quietly lead them to the couch, quietly shooing Jisung into Changbin's lap. We sit down and watch the other groups perform, Chan sat between us so he can smell whoever he wants.

Twice has just left the stage when the door opens to reveal the other group of three, the one who'd performed sometime before 3RACHA. Everyone in the room freezes, caught in various incriminating activities. Sure, we'd told the company about both relationships, but they hadn't been revealed to the public yet. Chan slowly pulls his arms from around our shoulders, his ears burning red. The three idols just stare for a moment, gaze flicking over to Jisung in Changbin's lap, both of them beet red. A glance shows me how nervous everyone is, so I put on a kind smile and stand up, greeting the three.

"Hello. We weren't expecting visitors, so we were relaxing while we watched the others perform. I remember seeing you guys, but I can't recall your group name," I say, trying to take their minds off the others. A faint smell drifts into my nose: blood with a familiar scent that's not quite right. My gaze lands on the man in the middle, a noiret with thick lips and a slightly awkward haircut. He steps forward and leads their greeting.

"Ah, right. We're CIX. We... noticed you in the crowd and had to come see you." Before I can say anything Chan has sat up on the couch and grabbed my wrist, pulling me closer. Jinyoung threads his fingers between Chan's and my own.

"Why?" The question itself is harmless, but the rumble accompanying it makes it seem dangerous. It was Jinyoung who asked, his face dark and stormy when I look back. Chan looks troubled.

"Ah, not like that! Just... he looks like a trainee from our company. We aren't supposed to tell anyone, but they're considering adding him to our group," says a taller blond. He fiddles with his hands before glancing up at me. "Uhm, if you don't mind us asking... what's your name?" Chan nods slightly, and Jinyoung continues to glare.

"Kim Yonghee." The strange, slightly off-kilter scent drifts into my nose again. "Who... who smells like an off-brand Chan." I mutter it before I can really think that I probably shouldn't, and all three members look shocked. They glance at Chan, except for the blond from earlier who just stares at me.

"What does that even mean? What are you?" I don't have time to figure out who asked before Chan grunts and is suddenly beside me, arms straining as he holds back Jinyoung. He looks incredibly upset. He's sad, too, but he's that kind of mad that people get when they get asked a difficult question they can't answer. I turn my back to the trio and stand in front of Jinyoung, putting a hand on either side of his face. His eyes, in contrast to his dark expression, are bright with anguish and rage.

"Baejin, calm down. It's okay, they didn't mean anything," I murmur. He must have lost himself in his head because even a light kiss gets no reaction. "Fuck." I look at the trio over my shoulder and frown. "I've kinda fucked it up, so you might as well stay for this. Close the door, though, and sit somewhere he can't see you."

"Why?" I snort at the blond's question.

"What's your name?"

"It's Hyunsuk. I'm the youngest." It brings another laugh to my mouth.

"Yeah, I can kinda fuckin' tell. You need to leave his sight because you hit a sore spot. He isn't the most rational right now, and if you don't go where he can't see, he might stab you with something. No offense." The trio looks mostly unphased, though the blond looks like he's going to be sick at the thought. The noiret pulls the other two fully into the room and closes the door before leading them around back of the couch. "Chan, make sure you don't drop him?"

"As if I'd ever," he says, mock offended. The grey has begun to shine through his dyed-brown hair again. Jinyoung relaxes slightly when I put my lips and teeth to his neck, pressing as close as I can to his chest. While this had been enough earlier, it's almost nothing now. I sigh and glance briefly at the trio, who are wide-eyed and blushing.

"Don't scream. Better yet, look away," I tell them. The _if you can_ remains unspoken because I know, from Jisung mostly, that morbid fascination has a way of keeping your attention on the sight of a vampire drinking blood. Jinyoung's skin gives easily, his blood welling up slowly. It has the sticky sweetness of syrup, which has always led me to believe he's some sort of maple tree. It's cold, still, though it's warmed since he left his prison. I doubt his heart's natural rhythm will ever increase, though. I take long pulls of his blood, feeling his turn to jelly against us. The tension leaves his body and his eyes, I know, are losing focus. I pull back and lap at the blood welling up, the red of it so bright that it seems almost unreal. "Tell them if you can, Channie," I murmur against Jinyoung's skin. "Or you can take Baejin and keep him calm." Jinyoung blinks wearily at me as I pull away, catching my hand with his own gone boneless. Tears well up in his eyes.

"I think it's my turn to tell, Yongie." He sounds sad, still, though not so upset at the trio. He sounds more upset at himself. He stumbles a little when he wrenches himself out of Chan's hold before he turns to the trio. "Can I have your names first, so it's easier to talk?" They nod and quietly introduce themselves, wide-eyed, still staring.

"I'm Lee Byounggon. Ignore stage names, please," the noiret says. He must be the leader.

"Yoon Hyunsuk," is the simple explanation of the tall, youngest member.

"I'm Kim Seunghun, vocalist," is the introduction the brunet gives. Jinyoung nods slowly.

"And which one of you is the natural werewolf?"

* * *

  
[JINYOUNG]  
I try not to think about it, the way Yonghee and Chan are so painfully different. The way I'll never be like the other dryads, that hasn't bothered me for millenia. And even Yonghee's little oddities aren't so bad for him because the natural vampires of this world are rotten, true monsters. Chan, though... seeing him talk to Byounggon about _wolf things_ makes me recall all the ways I messed when I dreamt him. He's not affected by the moon at all, and he can't do that mating bond thing I've read about. He's not any bigger than a normal wolf (although, technically, that _is_ what he started as) and he's got more of an attitude than most wolves, even if it is subdued most of the time. I'm surprised the Byounggon can even be an idol because, according to their conversation, it's almost torture for him to perform. Chan's senses, while much stronger than other humans', aren't anywhere close to natural werewolves. And Chan... he doesn't even consider himself a werewolf. He's just a wolf. He can't turn anyone (and I know this because he's bitten us both during the new moon), and--

"Jinyoung?" I blink rapidly and slowly look to the left. "Baejin, are you okay? You're crying." Yonghee's voice is quiet as he tugs on my shirt. I turn away from him, but Yonghee pulls me closer. The sigh that leaves my mouth is long and drawn out, laden with pain and laced with regret.

"I messed up. When I dreamt you two, I--"

"Please be quiet. I like who I am. I am who I am because of you, Jinyoung."

"But Chan--"

"Is also happy! What's wrong with wanting to be close to people you love? What's wrong with being a little restless at times when we're there to help ground him?" There's nothing wrong with it, both of them have told me before. I try to change tactics.

"Yonghee, you--"

"Hey. Look at me. Now think of those vampires you fought in the woods, how ruthless and vicious they were. Do you want me to be like them? Would you rather I fit in with them than be here, as I am, with you and Chan?" Usually, Jisung would interrupt with some kind of offense taken at being left out. He's quiet, though, happy to rest in Changbin's lap. They have a special stage later with another group.

"But you can't sleep. And when you stop moving, it's like--"

"Like I'm frozen in time. I know. You've said. But, Jinyoung, Baejin, my streak of gold, I--" A sigh, a moment for him to figure out what to say, and then, "I don't mind the not sleeping. My dreams aren't the same without you and Chan _really_ being there, not just some facsimile conjured by my mind. I like you two, not the fakes of the dreams that are my own. Now, _your dreams_ , I really like those. If you ever wanna have another one, I'm all for it." He says it with an easy smile as he noses against my neck, a habit he's picked up from Chan. I missed them both for so long that sometimes, being with them again doesn't feel real. Feels wrong, like something I shouldn't have. But I do have it, have _them_ , and they make sure to remind me every day. "I don't mind being an outcast as long as I can be weird with you and Channie." The soft voice in my ear is what finally calms me, eases me into the sleepy place that comes after a bout of stress.

"Can we cuddle, please?" I can feel his grin against my neck as he nods slightly. He eases me lengthwise onto the couch, my head coming to rest on Changbin's thigh. He opens his legs a little so Jisung drops between them, probably so Yonghee will be more comfortable. He quietly thanks Changbin and Jisung, and his murmur of "I love you" goes to the group that lives in the 3RACHA apartment. Someday the company will open up about our relationships, and then we can go on shows with Chan, Jisung, and Changbin, and we can all be happy, gooey, painfully-in-love losers on national television. The thought brings a lazy smile to my lips, little more than a quirk of a corner slightly up. As Yonghee wraps his arms around my middle, he presses lazy little kisses to my ear and neck. "Luh 'ou,'' I murmur sleepily. None of us will ever be the same as the people we're supposed to be like, but that's what happens when a new god tries to create. It's a little off, a little wrong, but still makes sense in its own way. I'm coming to understand and accept that, however slowly it might happen. Just before I fall into my dreams completely, I feel Chan press a kiss into my hair, and I smile.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Link](https://twitter.com/sunwooseok_/status/1345037907149656065?s=19) to the pictures that inspired chan in this chapter!
> 
> Hello! I am here to tell you that this is going to be a series! I'll post the next part soon, and so far, I think I'm going to allow requests on all of them as I have this one! The next one is just skz, I hope you enjoy!

**Author's Note:**

> find me on twt @sunwooseok_ and please comment i love answering questions about my writing
> 
> special thanks to lossit_bay here on ao3 for giving me the very last line, it made me smile when it was suggested. if you have any requests or things you'd want to see from this that i didn't write, please request it and i'll try to write it as an extra!


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